Today’s List: 10 Tips for a better life.
1. Don’t ever get in a van with a stranger, make him pay the candy up front.
2. They’re call girls when alive, hookers when they’re dead and wrapped in a rug in your trunk.
3. Never eat a salad.
4. Never eat a burrito off the floor unless it’s got at least steak, beans, and guacamole. Make salmonella be worth it.
5. Always make sure there is toilet paper before sitting down.
6. Instructions and directions are for weak-willed men.
7. Any time is Hammer Time.
8. Salsa is the worst coolant for a nuclear reactor.
9. Burn things. Always.
10. Be very scared of anyone who says they want to kill you in an Elmo costume. They WILL kill you.
Anonymous asked: YES.
Aw. Ok. :D
Anonymous asked: Why do you love My Little Pony so much?
Because there’s this girl that’s a butthead that alters it.
Why do I like her?
Beats the shit outta me.
I was asleep for only 3 hours.
I hate my brain most days.
So many memories, thoughts, feelings.
I shouldn’t cry.
Top 5 Movie Quotes I Would Say On My Deathbed
I saw a similar post on Reddit and it made me want to compile my own list from my movies so here it is.
Going in increasing sweetness:
5. “In case I don’t see ya good afternoon, good evening and goodnight!” -The Truman Show
4. “I’m too old for this shit.” -Lethal Weapon
3. “I’m a leaf on the wind, watch how I soar…” -Serenity
2. “I guess I could be pretty pretty pissed off about what happened to me…but it’s hard to stay mad when there’s so much beauty in the world…” -American Beauty
1. “I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I’ve watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time like tears in the rain…Time to die…” -Blade Runner
It’s the Little Things
As many of you know, I am quite glad I didn’t end up in Chicago.(for multiple reasons)
Of course this is all in retrospect, and who knows how my life would’ve gone there, but for now I can’t help it but be thankful for the choices I’ve made.
I was on Reddit just a little while ago and some guy mentioned how Chicago is supposed to have a high of -11 degrees Fahrenheit (or since we are the only country that uses them, we call them “Degrees F, where F stands for Freedom”). And a Minimum of -15 degrees.
That is hella cold yo.
And I do worry about my cousin that lives there with her family, I hope they’re ok, they’ve lived the good part of a decade there so I think they’re used to it.
Chicago sounds like a cold hell.
Yet another reason I’m glad I’m not there.
So far I think I am where I need to be an am meant to be.
Gotta be thankful for the little things.